Children come into this world with nothing except 10 fingers, 10 toes and their birthday suits. After they arrive, the “stuff” starts arriving. When it comes to “stuff,” there really is no difference between biological and adopted children. Where children go…”stuff’ follows.
I wasn’t present at Bunny’s birth, but I know she arrived with all 10 fingers and toes. We received many pictures chronicling her growth starting at four days. Her picture was taken every month when she went in for her baby checks. Her foster mother tried to dress her up for the doctor visits and we saw Bunny grow into a red frilly Christmas dress.
After months of waiting, our adoption became final and off to Guatemala we flew. As her foster mother handed her over to us for the final time, Bunny was dressed in her Sunday best, with a small bag of her personal items. Most of the clothes given to us became precious keepsakes, the delicate cotton and lace panties and dresses too fragile to be worn. But there was item in Bunny’s bag that was more precious than the clothes of her former life…her duck.
Bunny came with a duck, a little stuffed ducky that resembled a beanie baby. It was a bean filled stuffed animal with soft fuzzy fur, no bigger than a pickle jar. But this ducky meant the difference between a calm Bunny and an out of control Bunny.
Unlike Bunny, Elle came from Russia with nothing more than I gave her. She had no attachment to anything at the time, except her fingers. She finally attached to a satin edged blanket, but if Blankie weren’t available, any satin edged cloth would work. In a pinch, I could always pop into Walmart and buy another blanket. Not so with Bunny.
Bunny had to have Ducky when she went to sleep; she had to have him when she was in the car. She needed him everywhere…and she needed this Ducky. No substitutes. I found this out the hard way by introducing other fuzzy yellow ducks. Bunny wanted nothing to do with them.
When we realized there was no replacing Ducky, we started weaning her off the need to take him everywhere. Our biggest nightmare was losing Ducky. What would we do then? First we started leaving Ducky at home when we ran errands. Then Ducky stopped going to school for naptime. But if Ducky wasn’t in bed at nighttime, Bunny would come unglued.
Bunny is now six and Bunny still needs Ducky. Ducky has been sewn up and laundered many times and is showing some wear, but Ducky is much loved. We still have the clothes Bunny came with from Guatemala and I will give them to her one day. But I imagine Ducky will go with Bunny on her honeymoon. I hope her future husband will understand.
Photo Credit. LanitaM
